An ant crawling on my face woke me up. And dog farts. The sun rises so early. I love my sleep mask. Not motivated to work. More motivated to travel. Still craving nature and camping, even after our recent trip. I want to wake up slow, and drink tea on the tailgate. No bugs please. And no rush. You, me. The dogs pooping at the exact same time over by a bush. The four of us dirty and carefree. Exploring new home towns. Celebrating Summer with friends & strangers. Fishing, riding, hiking, hammock naps & outdoor cooking. With that greater sense of purpose always on the horizon, watching me like a parent, judging me. It appears to grow closer like a rainstorm. Can’t be certain it will open up to me though. Purpose is kind of a joke. I’m in my purpose right now. I can’t see that though. Like my eyes can’t see themselves. Needs are all met. But I want more. The wants grow heavy. A burden to my free spirit. Optimism slowly clouded by doubt. Anticipating the approaching rain with fear and excitement. Wash away the good with the bad. Leave me with whatever is true. This moment will pass soon. Seasons always do. Looking at only my feet. I take one step forward. A simple focus. A simple movement. I am reminded that I am grounded and at peace.
Photo by Justin Chatwin